Poetry Contest part 3 - The Saga Continues

This is a follow up to Poetry Contest part 2
A couple of weeks ago I received mail from The International Library of Poetry (poetry.com) giving me access to an exclusive offer.

I knew it was a mistake giving them my mailing address…

Apparently my poem has made it into the semi-finals in their “International Open Poetry Contest.” Yay, I’m not surprised, and it’s not because I’m confident in my ability (I’ve haven’t won a single contest entered). They want some of my scratch.

They sent a proof for me to look over and correct. There is one small typo on a quotation mark that wasn’t in the text I submitted; I know because I looked at it closely before I submitted it online. Besides, the quotation mark was there on the website when they tried to get me to buy a friggin’ plaque (See the screen capture from my post, Poetry Contest part 2). Also, I use the word “Hell”, and they changed it to “H***”. Really? I thought this was poetry for adults, not a children’s book.

Their saving grace (that speaks to a false sense of genuineness) is a disclaimer statement that says I have no obligation to send any money; my poem is still in the running. However, the typos seem to urge me to contact them. Hmm, what to do?

Let me bring to light the offers involved. First they offer me the opportunity to preorder the compilation ($49.95 plus $9.00 s&h) in which I would be printed, should I win, “Immortal Verses” - barf - that is an awful title. Previous compilation titles include, “The Promise of Dawn”, “A Symphony of Verse”, and “Tranquil Rains of Summer”. Does it get any worse than the tranquil rains of summer? It was a dark and stormy night…

But there are more offers to offer. Because I’m new to the International Society of Poetry I can order a “Limited Edition Protective Slipcover” embossed with gold leaf, with or without my name engraved on it. That’s $19.95 each, plus $5.00 s&h or with my name $25.95 plus $5.00 s&h.

Also along with the corrected proof, I have the additional opportunity to add an “Artist’s Profile”, basically a bio. However, in the final printed book, since the poem is set to take up one page, the bio must be printed on an opposing page at a nominal fee (at an undisclosed cost).

I suppose that I will return the corrected proof and see what happens. What else could they offer me? Engrave my poem onto a gold plate and shoot it into space? I might like that. I’ll post here the results…stay tuned.